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Treading Water

February 3, 2012
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I’m very new to WordPress and so far I’ve been amazed by the breadth of blogs out there. I’ve been in the stage between finishing being a student and starting my first job for a little while now so I feel my brain has become stagnant and it’s great to read peoples’ views on such a wide variety of things that get my mind working a bit.

Reading so many great blogs has got me thinking, what type of blogger should I be? Should I write about interesting news, humour, TV, politics, my life, your life, the MetLife blimp, the possibilities are endless. So let’s go for it, lets write about ALL these things in one post, it might just be crazy enough to work! (but the organiser in me requires clearly distinct sections!)

Section 1: Super interesting news

Russian scientists are days away from drilling through ice hundreds of thousands of years old to an actual lake of water, kept liquid by the heat of the earth’s core. Who cares? The reason I think this is cool is that this lake hasn’t seen light in 20 million years, who knows what they’ll find. If any life is found then it could mean that there is life on Europa, one of Jupiter’s moons where it’s also believed that under thick ice there is vast amounts of liquid water.

Want to read more? Check out the Washington Post article here

Section 2: Hahahumour!!

I honestly believe that I’ve made a huge mistake. Who puts themselves on the spot to be humorous? Stand up comedians you may say, and you’d be correct, and you’d make me look like a fool. My funny moment for the day was seeing that this ‘person’ was following me on Twitter:

It made me actually laugh out loud. We’re all used to spam and over the years it has got more subtle and conniving. What’s great about poor June Pedroza is that the scam is just so hilariously basic. Let’s get a picture of a pretty girl and add a link with not just the word ‘sex’, but also ‘gangbang’ and ‘hardcore’. What man wouldn’t immediately believe that this woman is a genuine sexual partner opportunity? It’s foolproof. I’ll take a break from writing this post while I head over to her website to woo her and make her mine.

Section 3: TV

I’m not American but when it comes to TV I really am. The USA is lucky to have so many great sitcoms, animated shows, hosts like Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert, dramas, it’s brilliant. What does the UK have to compete with the behemoth of American television? The answer is of course a show where the creators took a pretty famous British model and turned her into….A BODYBUILDER! I proudly present, Jodie Marsh: The latest victim of King Midas:

Section 4: Boring depressing politics

Even though I’m from the UK it’s impossible to avoid hearing about the Republican nomination contest. What makes this politics so depressing is the money being paid for advertising and smear campaigns. I’m genuinely shocked by the millions of dollars that these guys are spending to insult people in their own political party, at least the UK does something right. Please America, set a cap for the amount that can be spent on election campaigns. While the average person finds their income falling and their chance of employment reducing US politicians are building a multi-million dollar war chest to spend on defamation and mud-slinging. It’s one thing for politics to be boring but you guys are making it depressing.

Section 5: My life

As I said at the start of this crazy post, I’m just waiting to start my first job. It means that I’m in limbo at the minute because there’s no point doing any other jobs as I start in 4 weeks, but I’ve no money to do anything fun. If I could sum up how being stuck in this limbo makes me feel I’d do it by showing you this actual picture of what the sky looked like today where I live. I mean seriously, what are you supposed to do when it looks like this outside…

Section 6: Your life

Well, you’re just going to have to click on the comments box and let me know that you are in fact alive, and not June Pedroza inviting me to another one of her scrumptious gangbangs on twitter!

Section 7: The MetLife Blimp

I said I’d cover everything that I mentioned above… Did you know that the giant MetLife blimp is available for hire? You can get the blimp to do an actual flyover for your birthday party. With my birthday only a couple of months away I’m going to make sure that the MetLife blimp comes to the UK and drops a giant birthday cake down for me.

And so we’ve reached the end of this post, and discovered next to nothing about what kind of blogger I’m going to be!

 

(Lake Vostock photo from Washington Post, Jodie Marsh photo from kissandmakeuptv, Sad Face cereal from elgoog.cc, Metlife blimp photo from blog.amycrissman.com)

5 Comments leave one →
  1. February 3, 2012 3:41 am

    Very funny! I will now go to sleep thinking about ice and Republicans. One is interesting and the other repulsive. I should have some interesting dreams, thank you very much. Tomorrow, I shall come back and find out about Family Guy – one of my fave shows – and what my buddy, Seth (that’s how I like to think of him even though the restraining order says I’m not supposed to call him my buddy) did that rocked. Again. He’s always rocking. Except for those other two shows he’s responsible for. Ugh. How can someone so good go so wrong?

    • February 3, 2012 11:09 am

      Glad you enjoyed it! The question ‘Why Seth, buddy, why the Cleveland Show?’ is likely to be one of the prolific philosophical debates of future generations.

      • February 3, 2012 2:28 pm

        Ever notice that Cleveland speaks must faster on his own show. It’d have to be an hour long if he spoke at his usual pace. But that throws me off. Cleveland talking fast just isn’t right. It’s like the time Lois thought Peter was dead and had a fling with Brian. Uh-uh. Not right.

  2. WordsFallFromMyEyes permalink
    February 3, 2012 2:32 pm

    What a fantastic post!! You’re new to wordpress? I started only Nov last year myself, but this is just great – I’ve never posted like this!! Loved the pics. But I have to say, that woman body builder just made me sad – what she must have given up to look like that (time, family, work?) and she looks totally ugly to me. SORRY but she does. Like, wow.

    I loved your post. :)

    • February 3, 2012 2:48 pm

      Thanks so much for the comment! It’s really nice to get feedback from people who have blogged for a while because I’m still finding my feet. Yeah, the woman body builder thing is crazy, I’ve no idea what made her do that to herself and it’s just not natural to look like that.

      Thanks again for reading

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